How is it Ok to Constantly Want for Yourself?

9 February, 2022

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How is it Ok to Constantly Want for Yourself ?

Hope: Who else would you “ want ” for ?


Hope: And why would you want for others ?

Because it’s a nice thing to do……….

And because I love them

Hope: We are happy for you , that you know the feeling of love

What would you “ want ” for them ?

All sorts of things , you know , all the sort of stuff I’d want for myself , I guess

Hope: Actually , no , we don’t know

What do you mean ?

Hope: We don’t know what you would want , how could we , you are the one wanting it

Oh , ok

So do you want me to tell you ?

Hope: Yes please

Ok , well , I guess , I’d want…..


more money

and to travel……

and someone to share life with

and to be happy

and a new car , my old one is , well , OLD…..

and more time

and not to have to work anymore

Hope: So these are your wants ?


Hope: So you would want more money , travel , someone to share life with , to be happy , a new car

What kind of car ?

A sports car , something fast and sexy

Hope: Ok , a sports car , more time , and not to work anymore

Do we have it right ?


Hope: So who is someone specific you would want for ?

Just pick one person you’d start with

My brother

Hope: Ok , your brother

Why your brother ?

Because I love him , and he’s really generous , and he’s a great guy

Hope: Ok good

So , now what if we told you that he’s going to wake up tomorrow with all your wants

Would he be excited ?

What do you mean , that he’d have all the things I just listed ?

Hope: Yes , of course

Because you said you would want for others , all the things you want for yourself

So who would you pick to have all that , next ?

Let’s keep going , because there are heaps of others you can want for , right ?

Wait a minute………….

So it’s a literal thing ?

They’d get the same stuff ?

Hope: Yes

But my brother doesn’t need a new car , he’s got 2 already

Well ,  he doesn’t have a sports car….

He can’t ,  he’s got kids

Hope: Oh……

Guess he doesn’t need “ the someone to share life with ” either , seeing as he’s got kids

and perhaps their Mum……

Yeah (laughs)

That’s true

Hope: Maybe he’d like to not work anymore ?

No , he loves his job

and he gets to travel with it a lot already

Hope: Ok

I see what you’re doing

I get it

Hope: Great !

What do you see ?

Well firstly , I can’t want for others , what I want for myself , we’re different

And secondly , if I’m going to want for them

I need to know what they “want”

So I can ask for that !

Hope: But what if , “ what they want ” changes ?

You mean like they change their mind ?

Hope: Yes , that , and………..

Maybe a number of years ago , your brother would have loved all the things you’d want for him

Back before he had a family

Or if he ever worked a job he didn’t enjoy

Oh yeah , I see…………

Yeah , that’s right , cause we change over time and we are always….

“ Expanding ” , right ?

Hope: Yes , this can be your experience too…….

But think more , moment to moment

It can happen so much faster than that

And for all sorts of reasons

And the direction your brother may want to head

might make absolutely “ no sense ” to you

You may not understand his choices , at all

He has a totally different view of his life to what you see when you look at him

He’s living it

While you are doing “ you ”

Ok , so…………..

Are you saying it’s about having to choose for yourself ?

This is where the personal choice stuff comes in ?

Hope: Yes

You are all individual

 You all have the right to choose for yourselves

For a reason

You can’t know what another wants , really

Or when , or how they want it

You ,  are not them

And they , are not you

All sorts of things can occur to shape your wants and the beliefs that guide what’s important to the individual

So what do I do then ?

If I care about someone else ,  and I want them to have a great life , how do I do that ?

Hope: The short answer is , “ you ” can’t

And that’s because , you don’t get to choose for them

What you can do , “ for yourself ”

Because it feels good and you’ll be choosing to be your best self when you do

Is to be supportive

Supportive of the choices they make for themselves

In a way , you would , “ want for them , what they want for themselves ”

Ok I understand

But what if it’s with someone who’s in trouble or really making choices that hurt them or aren’t good for them ?

Hope: This is where it is hard for most of you to let go

To understand that the premise works and the laws of your universe are in play for good reason

You still don’t get to choose for them because you don’t like what they are choosing

Because it affects how “ you ” feel and see the world

You all came to physical with an agenda

Set by yourselves

Certain things you wanted to tick off your list

You don’t necessarily always choose exactly how they are going to unfold

In your place , in this scenario , we would imagine the person in a place of calm and peace

On the other side of the current circumstances

We would not try to figure out “ how ” that is going to happen

Simply that it does , or has

See them as happy , without chaos , full of joy

Then you are contributing to expansion

To unlimited thinking and Being

When they perhaps cannot do that for themselves

Don’t be specific about circumstances

That would be attempting to choose for them again

Simply imagine their state of Being

How they would feel 

How you would feel watching or thinking about them in this improved state of Being


It’s a much bigger conversation…….

And not what I started with

Not what I expected

Hope: Expectation , can be limiting


You can expect to be surprised !

We’d wish that for you

If we could

We would want your life to be filled with surprises

The kind that leave you peaceful

And blissful

And happy

You are all worthy and capable of that

Hope: We would like to circle back…….

Circle back , ok , to what ?

Hope: To the beginning of your asking

To the conversation before it unfolded

We want to explore why , when ” you ” want ,  it is not the self you focus on

This was actually your question , yes ?

Maybe ?

Hope: You asked “ How is it Ok to Constantly Want for Yourself ? ”

Oh , yeah

Hope: You can only “ want ” for the self

They are “ your ” wants

They are internal

A dialogue between the physical self and the energy that is you

We would ask you , 

Why do you think it is NOT ok to want constantly for the self ?

(without hesitation) BECAUSE IT’S SELFISH !

Hope: Yes it is

Why is that a problem ?


Before , I would have said………….

Well ,  just that selfish people only think about themselves

Hope: Again , yes

And what is wrong with that ?

Sometimes you need to think about others

Hope: Why ?

Cause it’s rude if you don’t and you need to consider others

It’s just polite and thoughtful

Hope: We agree

It is thoughtful

But given that results are only actioned when you “ want ” for yourselves

You are actually attempting something that will not bring results and at the expense of your own expansion and happiness

If YOU don’t want for you

No one else ACTUALLY can

So , why are you leaving yourself out ?

*Please know that right here

there is a long emotional silence

in front of us a wonderful thoughtful human being is struggling

they are unable to answer

Hope: We can see that you have an answer

One that is obviously difficult to voice

Lets just breathe

Small breathes , in……

and out…….

and then in…….

and again out……

Try a larger , longer , slower breath

you are safe

and can take your time

we can just sit together

……. I’ve just realised…….that I don’t feel worthy of asking for things for myself

Hope: So you don’t think you deserve to ask for things for you ?


Hope: And that thought is painful ?

It hurts when you think about it ?


Hope: Would you like to feel better than you do about this ?

Yes , I didn’t realise I was hurting myself like that

Hope: Have you just “ started ” thinking like this

Is it new ?


I don’t feel like it is

I feel like I’ve always thought that way about myself

Hope: When do you think it started ?

I’d say back when I was a kid

I remember , we were always taught that it was selfish to put yourself before others

We were told that it was wrong and that we had to consider other people first

It was just good manners

Hope: You say “ we ”,  you mean you and your brother ?

Yeah , it’s just something our parents drilled into us growing up

Hope: Do you think your brother feels the same way about himself?

I don’t know

Maybe ? We’ve never really talked about it

Hope: Do you think it’s possible that he feels differently to you , although you were bought up the same way together ?

Yeah , sure , it’s possible

Hope: Ok , so your original question was about asking and wanting things for yourself

Is that because you are familiar with the fundamental of “ always getting what you ask for ” ?

Yes , well sort of , I’m starting to see how it’s all connected

Hope: That’s great

If you always get what you ask for

And , all you have to do is ask

And , what’s happening in your life is a reflection of what you’re wanting and attracting to you

And , your brother seems to have a lot of really wonderful things happening in his life

like he’s happy

and his family and a great job that he enjoys

and being able to travel and share his life with those he loves

Do you think he is able to ask for things for himself ?

When you put it like that , yes I do

I can see that he must

The results show that

Hope: Yes , they do

Do you have any thoughts on why your take away from the same upbringing would create such different results ?

Not really , I don’t understand it

Maybe like we talked about earlier , we’re just different people

Hope: Yes you are , absolutely

But there is something that you both share with every other person on your planet


And when you take a thought and repeat thinking it , you create a BELIEF

And your beliefs are what attract and create your life and what happens in it

They are just thoughts , that you keep having

Somewhere in your growing up , your thoughts surrounding

“wanting” led to the belief

That wanting for yourself was selfish


That you weren’t worthy anyway

We are sure , this was not what your parents were trying to achieve

They , through their beliefs , thought they were raising their children to be caring , considerate Beings

The empowering part about this moment , is that now you KNOW

You can only want for yourselves

And this may be selfish , but that’s how it was designed

You can change your thought

You can create a new NOW belief

For starters , perhaps you could give a new positive meaning to the word ” selfish ”

There is no point in holding onto a belief that no longer serves you

You can let it go

Now you can begin to change this thought about yourself

You can choose something else as your experience

It’s a wonderful forward step in your self care

It makes us so happy for you

So how exactly do I create a thought ?

I don’t know that I can change how I feel

Hope: It may take some practise and you need to allow yourself to catch up to your new want

You’ve spent your life till now using a belief that wasn’t working for you

Now is about creating a new habit

And habits , like beliefs , are about repeated behaviour or actions

Start gently

Just sit with the thought , that from here on , you are going to explore how it might feel to change the way you feel about yourself

Could you be open to that ?


Hope: Great

” Maybe ” is very powerful

It’s full of possibility

Something else we’d recommend

Is to be mindful of the way you talk to yourself

And about yourself

Tangled in your everyday thoughts and speech will be reinforcement of how you used to see yourself

Humans use words to communicate , not only with each other , about each other

But personally with how you express who you are to others and yourselves

If you catch yourself saying or thinking something uncomplimentary about yourself

Just stop

Taking note of it

Catching yourself is an integral step to shifting your energy and it’s flow

In those milliseconds 

Everything changes

And gets better

Better than it was before

And as you get better at doing it

You will feel freer

And it will be easier

You will have a new NOW belief

Until you reach a point where you are completely up to speed with a new version of you

And as this new you , the latest model

You KNOW you deserve all the joy and happiness life has to offer

And we know this , with all certainty


And because there are no mistakes in life

You can only get it right

And you have the power to redefine each want or belief by simply choosing again

And ages ago , somewhere in the last 10 minutes of your time

You actioned a new future

You in that moment , became a vibrational match to MORE

When you made a connection with wanting more for yourself

And agreeing to be open to what that brings

Which is a good thing

There is no need for worry

Because it’s already on it’s way to you

It already exists

You created it

Way back there

So you’re saying that it’s already happening ?

Hope: Yes

Where ?

It’s in the vortex with the best version of you that can exist

The one that keeps expanding

And soon enough , you will connect and feel everyday

How you feel when you’re connected to your Vortex

Remember , the Vortex is an energy stream

It’s a forever feel good energy

And you are all part of it

If you want to connect as often as possible with it



Find fun

The more you do this

The easier it is

To connect with infinite possibility

And choice

To want more

More of the stuff that feels good

More of the stuff that’s fun

More peace

Something better than what you’ve already got going on 

More of  YOU , the one you imagine

We want to thank you for sharing

We have found joy in our conversation and who you are

In this moment , AND the next

Always and forever


Much love


1 Feb, 2022


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